Thanksgiving Outlook
By Elliot Abrams, excerpted from the book
“Weather Prognosticators and the Media:
Fallacies, Facts, and Fun in Forecasting”
by Norm Macdonald
Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in
the oven to an afternoon high near 190 F. The
kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother
the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold
shoulder. During the late afternoon and evening,
the cold front of a knife will slice through the turkey,
causing an accumulation of one to two inches
on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one
side while cranberry sauce creates slippery
spots on the other. Please pass the gravy.
A weight watch and indigestion warning have
been issued for the entire area, with increased
stuffiness around the beltway. During the evening,
the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers,
dropping to a low of 34 F in the refrigerator.
Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high
pressure to eat sandwiches will be established.
Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days
with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late
in the day. We expect a warming trend where
soup develops. By early next week, eating
pressure will be low as the only wish left will be
in the bone.
Latest Post: IRC How-To Our newest member: Wrotkaw Recent Posts Unread Posts
